HOW TO AVOID SHARED PARENTING PROBLEMS
by Linda W. Chodos, Esq.

Visitation

1. If you cannot be on time for pickup or drop off, let the other parent know with as much advance notice as possible.

2. Don't try to make up lost time by adding or subtracting time from the next visit without an agreement to do so.

Children's Activities

1. Don't involve the children in attractive activities just before the other parent is due to pick them up or before they are due to go home.

2. Don't schedule activities which cut into the other parent's time with the children unless the other parent agrees.

3. Let the other parent's time be quality time with the children. A parent is not a "visitor". Children need large blocks of time with each parent.

4. Collaborate on special holidays and birthdays if possible.

5. Be willing to take the children at times when it will help out the other parent. Don't lose out on seeing them to spite the other parent.

Communication

1. Allow the other parent access to school, medical and other records.

2. Communicate with the other parent when the child is sick or has other special needs. If a child has a protracted illness, let the other parent visit at your home.

3. Recognize that every person has his or her own style of child rearing and be respectful of those differences.

4. Don't use clothes or play equipment as a weapon.

5. Communicate the children's needs to the other parent.

6. Let the children call the other parent once a day if they want to. Don't call the children more than once a day when they are with the other parent.

7. Be open to counseling if you are experiencing negative feelings you can't control. Be open to mediation to resolve problems with the other parent and/or the children.

ABOVE ALL, LET THE ANGER GO AND GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE!